MARCH MASSACRE
Wednesday, March 24, 2004
MIGHTY WHITE MARAUDERS 20
DARK DESTROYERS 7
The SFA will look at an incident towards the end of an ill-tempered encounter as the Might White Marauders lost both their discipline and the match at the Camp Nou de la Glesga last night.
Chief culprit was Christian Graham who had spent the match battling aggressively with Alan Gillies and finally was seen to take a swipe at him off the ball as the Destroyers cruised to yet another victory. Despite Alan not reacting it is expected that the SFA will use video evidence to punish the striker.
It was undoubtedly the most entertaining part of what was a very one sided match. Long before Graham's discipline was lost entirely the Destroyers had destroyed the Marauders.
To be fair, it was 3-3 after 20 minutes. After 25 it was about 10-3 and the match was as good as over. The Marauders wished it was.
Man of the Match - Martin? Iain? Alan? Si? Me(ha ha ha ha)? I really don't have a scooby. Maybe Alan 'coz he scored a few and had a decent battle with Christian.
Goal of the Match - Ummm. I seem to remember Christian scoring a belter at one point, although it could have been memorable more for the fact that the Whites had scored, rather than it being a great goal.
Miss of the Match - Don't remember any sitters missed so I'll go for my stunning outside of the right boot, swerving thunderbolt that cannoned off the junction of post and bar (at least that's the way I remember it).
Save of the Match - Tom's brave block of a Martin thunderbolt. He heroically flung his hand in front of the ball, dislocating a finger in the process, in a stunning example of putting the team before his own well being. It was a shame the ball still went in.
Player ratings
Mighty White Marauders
Christian - 4
The Christian guide to football - Get the ball, kick in direction you are facing as hard as possible, kick Alan as hard as possible, repeat for an hour.
Tom - 4
Heroically sacrificed a finger for the team but didn't do much else.
Luke - 4
I'm just giving everyone 4 on this team 'coz they got such a doing.
Neil - 4
Never even made his usual half dozen heroic saves. On the full time whistle he was heard to mutter "I hate magic numbers...."
Craig - 4
Was as fit as ever but was guilty of giving up when the team went behind. Poor attitude - the man's a slacker!
Dark Destroyers
Alan - 8
Doubled his goals tally for the season to date and got a few good elbows in on Christian. A worthwhile outing.
Iain - 7: Never repeated his one man show of last week but played well again. He has perfected the "Cochrane dummy" maneuver.
Martin - 7
Scored umpteen and might have got man of the match but for the girly hair band he was wearing. That and the Rangers top. ?
Si - 7
Another professional outing from the Si-man. I thought about giving him man of the match too, but he's not unbeaten like Alan.
Me - 7
Outstanding. Fantastic. Gorgeous. Take your pick, I was all of these. Unfortunately I have to admit that the green shorts, blue top combination ruined my chances of getting a perfect 10 score.
TEH FINGER!
Tom's "heroic" save resulted in this horrible injury (note: he didn't actually save the ball).